QUITTING SUGAR
I’ve been attempting to quit sugar. You know, no more candy bars, pies, ice cream and no white sugar in my coffee or oatmeal or fried eggs. Ha! Got ya there, didn’t I?
Anyway, I am going on my third week and I have discovered something. Apparently, I don’t like coffee! I’ve consumed several cups every day of my life for more decades than I would prefer to name, but apparently it was just a vehicle for sugar!
It would appear that I am also not a big fan of oatmeal. It too was simply a substance that could carry sugar to my taste buds.
Who knew?
I’ve lost five pounds already. Another twenty-five to go.
SPELLCHECK
Why is it that when MS Word’s spell checker can’t identify a word that I have mangled that I can type the same random letters into Google search and it will come back and say, “Did you mean . . .” and tell me the correct spelling for the word I was trying to write? Maybe MS Word should use Google’s spell checker?
How come CAPITAL letters often don’t get searched by a spell checker? If I can’t spell a word in lower case I’m sure prone to mangle it in all upper case!
And the headline box in Word Press doesn’t check spelling. What’s with that?
I would like to see Google reprogrammed so that if you miss one letter in a word it asks “Did you mean…?” but if you mangle the word horribly it says “What the F*** are you trying to say?”
One last thing – how come when I misspell a word in Google search advertisements for improving your spelling don’t pop up?
FREAKING WINN DIXIE SONG!
Winn Dixie, a not so good chain of grocery stores has the motto, “Getting better all the time.” Which makes me stay away from them. What do they mean? “Our meat only kills three people a month now, and most days our milk isn’t sour!” I think I’m going to wait until their motto is “We got it right finally!” Or something to indicate they don’t still have problems and are still trying to improve.
Also, they have this nasty tune…”Getting Better All the Time” that gets stuck in my head and I wind up singing it all freaking day! Drives me nuts!!!
CROOKED POLICE OFFICERS
What the hell is going on with police these days? Hardly a day goes by without reports of police officers being arrested, being fired, being investigated! In south Florida it is so bad that when I see a cop behind me with their lights on I’m not sure I should pull over or flee! Aren’t police officers suppose to set an example? Or not? What is required to be a police officer these days? Is the pay that low we can’t attract honest people? Maybe we need to consider steps to reduce crime, like cutting back on police? If so many of them are bad maybe we shouldn’t give them weapons, a silver badge and guns? Get them off the street!
Seriously, I respect police, and my best friend was an officer for decades. I just don’t trust them anymore. Scary.
SUPER BOWL TIPS FOR LOCALS
Lots of strange people will be in South Florida this weekend, so let me give you locals a few tips.
1. Those flashing red lights on the rear of automobiles are called Turn Signal Indicators, something that is utilized by the rest of the country. They often indicate which direction a drive is going to turn toward. They are NOT targets, so don’t shoot them!
2. That strange language that you hear the out of towners speak is actually “English” a language that used to be spoken here. Do your best to understand them, and if not, just smile and say “Go Packers!” Again, don’t shoot them!
3, If someone walks up to you and says “Who Dat?” just smile and say back to them “Go Packers!” Oh, and don’t shoot them!
4. If you are actually going to the game, remember, Homeland Security is concerned about terror threats, so plan on arriving early, like last Tuesday. No bags, umbrellas, coolers or clothing is allowed. (Bring a handkerchief to sit on, as the seats can be sticky from gum and old beer. That stuff is a bitch to get off your ass.)
Full body scanners will be in use, and just like at some cruise ships, you will have an opportunity to purchase 8 X 10’s at the end of the game. Otherwise they all get posted on The Drudge report.
That’s my Friday report! Peace out people!
SCG